Writing this Saturday evening, I’m reflecting on something we all desperately crave: external validation. Whether it comes through the eyes of our family and friends or the digital dopamine hits of likes and comments, this hunger for approval feels intoxicating when we receive it, and devastating when we don’t. This validation addiction keeps us trapped in a perpetual performance, constantly shape-shifting to please others, making ourselves smaller to avoid rejection because we don’t feel safe being authentically ourselves.
When you choose to build a business, you must emerge from the shadows and own your expertise. You must demonstrate your knowledge and share your unique perspective. Yet here’s where most coaches, course creators, and entrepreneurs get stuck: they remain trapped in teaching mode instead of showing how they actually lead their lives. This is what creates true differentiation and builds genuine community, not just dispensing information, but embodying transformation.
The Fatal Flaw Most Female Entrepreneurs Make
One of the biggest misconceptions I held (and witness in countless women entrepreneurs) was believing that having an exceptional product was enough to generate sales. I thought I could hide behind my offerings without revealing my values, my lifestyle, or how I navigate my own journey. But here’s the uncomfortable truth: there’s virtually no difference between products in the same niche. The distinction lies in storytelling, branding, and the emotional connection that compels someone to invest $5 or $5,000.
For years, I struggled to share my personal story, my daily reality, and how I actually lead my life. I didn’t understand that people who become long-term supporters aren’t just purchasing products, they’re buying into a vision, a dream, and a projection of who they aspire to become.
The Magnetic Power of Life Leadership
Study anyone who generates significant revenue, and you’ll notice something fascinating: people don’t just admire their products, they want to live their lifestyle, they resonate with their worldview, they respect their willingness to take risks. They’re captivated by how obsessed these leaders are with crafting an extraordinary life and the transparency with which they share their journey.
Look at Gary Vaynerchuk, Dan Koe, or Alex Hormozi. They don’t just share business strategies, they reveal how they structure their days, how they make difficult decisions, how they think about everything from relationships to revenue. They own every choice they make and aren’t afraid to show it. Furthermore, they’re not trying to convince anyone or seeking universal approval, they’ve abandoned the “good girl” mentality that keeps most of us invisible.
Many talented individuals can’t understand why others with seemingly less skill are building thriving businesses. The answer is simple: those successful entrepreneurs lead their lives boldly and own every decision publicly. They’re not hiding behind generic advice or trying to please everyone.
Beyond Traditional Expert Positioning
Establishing yourself as an authority requires more than:
Identifying your niche
Sharing tips and solutions
Presenting your unique methodology
In an age where artificial intelligence makes information ubiquitous, you must demonstrate that you’re obsessed with leading an extraordinary life. This is why there’s truly no competition, everyone else is busy copying because they’re not proud of their own results. They feel compelled to fabricate stories about earning millions, living in Bali, or losing 10 pounds in two weeks.
But people are starving for authenticity and genuine connection. They need to form parasocial relationships with real humans who inspire them. This is why communities are exploding on platforms like Discord, Zoom, and Skool, people crave connection around authentic leaders, not just information.
How to Lead Your Life and Stand Out
First: Define Your Stand Write fearlessly about what you champion and what you oppose within your industry. Share your story including the blocks, failures, and hard-earned lessons. Articulate your core beliefs and describe the daily habits that align with your business vision.
Second: Own Your Current Results
Celebrate where you are right now, even if it feels small. Someone desperately wants your current level of success, whether that’s losing 5 pounds, replacing part of your income, or rebuilding after a difficult breakup. You must find the courage to claim your space and give yourself permission to step beyond your comfort zone.
Third: Lead by Example Do things first, even when others don’t understand your choices. Ask yourself: Who do you want to become? Based on your ideal day, your habits, your routine, your physical presence, and your vision for life, get crystal clear about your direction despite the fears and obstacles you face (limited funds, time constraints, fear of failure, impostor syndrome, people-pleasing tendencies, etc.).
The Permission You’ve Been Waiting For
Stop waiting for perfect credentials, flawless results, or universal approval before you start leading. Your current journey, with all its messiness and imperfection, is exactly what someone needs to witness. Your willingness to be authentic about where you are while boldly pursuing where you’re going is magnetic.
The world doesn’t need another teacher hiding behind their curriculum. We need leaders who are courageously living their message, making mistakes publicly, celebrating small wins genuinely, and showing us what’s possible when you choose authenticity over approval.
Your life is your greatest teaching tool. Your daily choices, your boundary-setting, your risk-taking, your recovery from setbacks, this is what creates unshakeable personal brands and devoted communities.
Stop teaching from the sidelines. Start leading from the arena of your own beautifully imperfect, constantly evolving, unapologetically authentic life.
Your leadership begins the moment you decide your life is worth sharing.
If you want to go deeper, join my free Telegram community True circle: a space where I share no-fluff tips, mindset breakthroughs, and storytelling secrets to help you scale your business without losing yourself in the process.
